Uuuuuuugh, apps. Remember when the iPhone first came out and everyone was all peeing their jeans over pointless novelty apps? "Look! My phone looks like a glass of beer and then when I tilt it it looks like I'm drinking my phone!" "See, it's like my regular face, only now I have a craaaaaaaazy mouth!" "So, it's a picture of a zipper...and you can unzip it. Can't do that with a regular picture of a zipper, can you!?" Okay. So you're saying you spent $400 on a fake mustache and some got-your-nose uncle...
